サウスパークで学ぶ英語

s11e07 Night of the Living Homeless

Pocket

ホームレスの集団がサウスパークを襲う話です。まるでホームレスをゾンビのように描いていて、ゾンビ映画の常識のような展開のパロディが豊富です。


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[The neighborhood, day. The boys head for the park.]
Cartman: All right, this time, it’s me and Kenny versus you two assholes.
今回はおいらケニー組対お前らな
Kyle: Fine.
よし
Stan: [stops] Oh, dude, what’s with all the homeless people? [all around the basketball court homeless people loiter or sleep. There’s one bum sleeping at center court. The boys walk up to him] Sir, could you move a little, please?
何だよ、このホームレス。どいてくれません?
Bum: Spare some change?
小銭恵んで
Cartman: [pinches his nose shut] Aw, dude, he smells like Kenny’s house. [releases the pinch] Get out of here!
ケニーんちのにおいだ。どきやがれ!
Kyle: You guys, that’s not cool. These people have nowhere to go. [a slow pan of the homeless around them] They don’t have food or shelter. We have to do something.
この人達、行くところないんだぞ。食べるものもないし。何とかしなきゃ。
Stan: Well dude, what are we supposed to do?
どうすんだよ?
Kenny: (Yeah, what are we supposed to do?)
Cartman: No, Kyle’s right, you guys. We should do something.
カイルが正しい。何とかしないと。
Kyle: Really?
ほんとに?
Cartman: Yeah. I know what you’re thinking, Kyle, and I’m with you. I know exactly what we should do.
お前の考えに賛成だ。おいらはわかってる。
[Moments later, kids from around the neighborhood gather in the basketball court.]
Butters: [through a bullhorn] Gather ’round and witness the glory as Eric Cartman attempts to jump his skateboard over the homeless. [Stan and Kenny prepare the ramp at center court for Cartman]
栄光なる挑戦にご注目。エリック・カートマン、スケボーでホームレス越え!
Cartman: Thank you, thank you. [to Stan and Kenny] The ramp ready?
どうも。ジャンプ台は?
Stan: Yeah, it’s all set.
いいぞ。
Clyde: He won’t make it.
無理だな。
Kyle: Excuse me, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind!
これ僕の考えじゃないんですけど!
Cartman: All right, here we go! Jimmy? [Jimmy starts the drum roll. Cartman takes off and picks up speed on his way to the ramp. Tweek and Bebe have their fists ready to pump for him. He leaves the ramp successfully, only to land on the bum and hit the ground without injury]
よし!いくぞ!ジミー!
Bum: Oh! Aww.
Cartman: [jumps off his skateboard] Yes! I did it! [tosses his helmet away] I jumped over the homeless![turns around] Yes!
よっしゃ!やったぜ!ホームレス飛び越えた!よっしゃあ!
Kenny: (Yehes!)
Stan: That was a sweet idea, Kyle. [smiles]
いい考えだな。
Kyle: God damn it, that wasn’t my idea!
ざっけんな!僕の考えじゃない!
[South Park City Hall, day, the City Council. The Mayor is presiding and her two aides stand behind her]
Mayor McDaniels: All right, people, we need to come up with answers. There are homeless sprouting up all over town. What are we supposed to do? [silence for a few seconds]
ではみなさん。街中に発生してるホームレスはどうしましょうか?
Fire Chief: Well, I, I short of had an idea.
解決策ではないんだが、
Mayor McDaniels: Please, Mr. Valmor.
どうぞ。バルマーさん。
Mr. Valmor: [the fire chief] We could give the homeless all designer sleeping bags and makeovers. At least that way they’d be pleasant to look at.
デザイナー寝袋を与えてはどうだろう?少なくとも見た目は良くなる。
Other Members: Oh, that’s a good one. Good idea. I like it.
名案だ。いいね。
Randy: Well I was thinking: We could turn the homeless into tires, so that we’d still have homeless, but we could use them, on our cars.
俺の考えは、ホームレスをタイヤにするんだ。いなくはならないが、車の部品として使える。
Mr. Valmor: Ohh, that’s a good one.
それもいい!
Mr. Mackey: Nice one, Randy.
いいね!
Gerald: Like it.
いい。
Aide: That’s like recycling.
リサイクルだね。
Mrs. Testaburger: All right, enough! I find this whole conversation to be extremely offensive! The homeless aren’t monsters, they are people, like you and me!
もうよして!どれだけ不快な会話をしているのよ。
Randy: You mean they’ve adapted, copied our DNA.
つまり奴らはDNAをコピーして変化したと!
Homeless Advisor: Excuse me. I am the top researcher of homeless studies for Park County. I don’t know why more homeless people are showing up in town, but I do know… that we must be extremely careful. If we give them anything, there could be more.
失礼、私はホームレス研究の第一人者ですが、なぜこの待にホームレスが現れるのか不明だ。極めて慎重にならなければ!もし何かを与えてしまえば、更に増えるかもしれん。
[Kyle’s house, a rainy night. Kyle looks out from a window on the second floor and sees a homeless man on the sidewalk. The man carries a used tin can with his right hand and a small “SPARE CHANGE?” cardboard sign with his left hand. A car passes by and honks. Kyle takes pity on him and comes downstairs. He opens the front door, exits, and walks up to the man.]
Kyle: Hi. I’ve uh… [the man faces him] I’ve been saving up for a new Xbox game but… but I think you could use the money a lot more than I could. Listen I, I want you to take this. [hands him a bill] It’s twenty dollars. [drops it into the tin can and backs up, smiling]
あの、新しいXboxの為に貯金してたけど、僕よりあんたが使ったほうがいいと思うんだ。これ持ってって、20ドル。
Bum: Got any more?
もっとない?
Kyle: [frowns] No, that… I thought that was a lot.
いや、結構あげたと思うけど。
Bum: [turns around and walks off a bit, asking no one in particular] Spare any change?
小銭恵んで。
Kyle: [sad at the lack of gratitude] You’re welcome. [walks back into the house with his head down]
どういたしまして。
[South Park, morning. Kyle climbs onto his toy box and looks out the window again. More homeless people have arrived and are camped out in front of the house.]
Kyle: Oh crap. [the doorbell rings and Kyle comes down to answer it. Stan, Kenny, and Cartman enter]
あぁ、もう
Stan: Dude, what are all these homeless people doing in front of your house?
何でこんなにいんだよ?
Kyle: I don’t know.
知らないよ!
Cartman: There’s a bunch outside my house too.
おいらんちもだぞ。
Bum: [female] Spare any change, sir?
お恵みを
Cartman: No! Fuck off! [slams the door shut]
うっせぇ!
Stan: I don’t get it. My Dad said as long as nobody gave them money, they’d move on.
パパはお金あげなきゃ、どっか行くって言ってたのに。
Kyle: He did?
ほんと?
Cartman: Well this is bullcrap! Somebody has to be responsible!
冗談じゃねぇ。誰か責任取れ!
Kyle: Well, I… kind of gave a homeless guy twenty dollars last night.
あの、昨日のよる。20ドルあげちゃった。
Cartman: You what?!
何?
Kyle: Oh c-come on, that can’t be why they’re all here. There has to be another reason.
だ・・だからって、こんなに集まる?別の理由があるよ。
Stan: Kyle, what were you thinking?
何考えてる!
Cartman: [makes his way to Kyle] Yeah! I can’t possibly jump these many homeless people! I won’t risk it! I could jump two homeless people, maybe three, but asking me to jump this many is asking me to risk my life, Kyle!
これ以上ホームレス飛び越せねぇぞ!危険過ぎる!2,3人は飛び越せても、それ以上頼むのは命をかけろと言ってる事だぞ。
Kyle: I don’t want you to jump them, retard!
そんなの頼んでねぇ!脳タリン!
[South Park, commercial district, day. Randy walks along Main Street, not really paying attention…]
Bum 1: Spare some change?
小銭恵んで
Randy: No, sorry, I don’t have any change.
悪い、持ってないから。
Bum 2: [a few stores down] Got any change?
お恵みを
Randy: No, sorry. [the bum follows him until he passes the third bum]
悪いな
Bum 3: Can you spare some change? [Randy looks back and runs into the fourth bum]
恵んでくれません?
Bum 4: [holds out his cup] Chaaange?
お恵みを
Randy: Huh! I don’t have any change. [more bums come out of the woodwork and crowd in on him]
小銭ないって
Bum 5: [an elderly woman] Change?
恵んで
Randy: No!
やだ
Bum 6: Change? [Randy runs across the street, but…]
恵んでぇ
Bum 7: Spare some change?
小銭恵んで
Randy: [shielding himself with his suitcase] Leave me alone I don’t have any change!
かまうな!持ってないから!
Bum 7: All right, God bless you, sir.
わかったよ。神のご加護を。
Randy: Oh, now I feel bad. [goes back to the bum] Here! [tosses some change into the cup] Ahh! [the other bums reach the other side of the street] Hahh! [begins to run, but other homeless people appear, asking for change. Randy moves past them] Nono, that was really all the change I had.
気分悪りぃな。ほらよ!本当にあれで全部。
Bum 7: [jumps into view again] Spare some change?
小銭恵んで
Randy: I just gave you change!
お前にやっただろ!
Bum 8: [another old woman] Change? [the homeless crowd Randy in and he can’t escape. Their pleading takes on a chanting quality: “Change? Change? Change? Spare some change? God bless. …”]
恵んで
Randy: Wahhh! I don’t have any more change! [makes his way through the crown of bums] Noo! I don’t have any change! I don’t have any chaaange! [disappears under the sea of homeless people]
もう無いって!もうないんだよ!ないんだってばぁ!
[The South Park Community Center, day. Gerald, Jimbo, and the Stotches are present.]
Gerald: Okay, that’ll be great. Let’s also make sure we have enough chairs in the community center for everyone to attend.
助かったよ。それじゃ人数分の椅子があるか確認しよう。
Randy: [outside] Waaah! [bangs on the doors] Awwww! [enters, shuts the door behind him, and locks it] Stay away! [implores and pounds on the door] Stay awayhay!
こっちくんな!くるなぁ!
Jimbo: Randy? Randy, what happened?
ランディ、どうした?
Randy: Stay awa- …I don’t have any change! [collapses on the floor against the door] I don’t have any chaaaahahange!
こっちか!もうないからぁ!もう小銭ないぃぃ!
[A splash screen comes up for News 5.]
Announcer: This is a News 5 Special Bulletin, with Chris Swollenballs.
ニュース5速報、司会はクリス・スウォルンボールズ。
Chris Swollenballs: South Park has become overrun with the homeless. [a shot of the homeless crowd in front of South Park Elementary, then another shot of them in front of Tom’s Rhinoplasty] Nearly every square inch of public property is now riddled with homeless, shutting down roadways and making getting around impossible. [a portrait of a homeless woman] Many people are trapped throughout the town. [an aerial shot of the community center. The center is surrounded by homeless people, with the five adults inside it now on the roof]
サウスパークがホームレスであふれかえってます。全てをうめつくすほどのホームレスで交通昨日も麻痺しており、多くが取り残されてます。
Randy: Help! Help us!
助けて!助けてくれぇ!
[Kyle’s house, living room. The boys watch the breaking news on TV]
Stan: Dude, it’s our dads.
パパたちだ!
Kyle: Oh my God.
大変だ。
Chris Swollenballs: In the meantime, South Park citizens are being advised to stay indoors and protect their change.
当面、サウスパーク市民は室内にとどまり身を防いでいたほうがいいでしょう。
Bum 9: [appears behind him in the newsroom] Spare some change?
小銭恵んで
Chris Swollenballs: What the? You can’t be in here.
何だ。なんでここに?
Bum 9: Ya got any change, sir?
恵んでくれよ
Chris Swollenballs: No I don’t have any change. How did he get in here?
小銭ないから。どうやってここに!
Bum 10: Chaaaaange?
恵んでぇ!
Chris Swollenballs: No, please. I don’t have any change. Honest I don’t. I don’t have any- [a PLEASE STAND BY screen pops up and the station goes off the air]
やめてくれ!小銭ないから!ほんとだって!持ってな
Cartman: You see what you did, Kyle?!
お前のせいだぞ!
Stan: Come on, we have to try and help our stupid parents. [the boys turn off the TV and head outside]
あほ親たち助けないと
[Kyle’s house, outside.]
Cartman: They’re everywhere!
うじゃうじゃいやがる
Aide: [pulls up in his car] What are you boys doing? Get in.
何をしてる!乗れ!
Bum 11: [knocks on his window] Spare any change, sir?
お恵みを
Aide: [throws up his arms and shakes his head vigorously] Ahhhh! [settles down and starts driving]Come on, let’s go! [some distance down the street] What the hell were you doing outside?!
ほら!行くぞ!外で何してた!
Stan: Our parents are stuck on top of a building in town.
親たちを助けに行こうと
Aide: You aren’t getting into town! It’s completely overrun with these… things. [a bum lands on the windshield]
もうだめだ。街中あふれかえってる
The Boys: Ahh! [the bum begins to wash the windshield]
Aide: No! I don’t need my windshield cleaned! Stop it! Stop iiit! [peels off at the first opportunity]Look, our only hope is to talk to the homeless researcher out on Travis Street. He understands what’s goin’ on better than anybody. Just stick with me, kids. [enters an intersection, but doesn’t notice the driver to his left, who’s not paying attention to the road. They collide, with the aide dying on the spot]
やめろ!窓拭かなくていい!やめろ!唯一の希望はトラビス通りのホームレス研究者だ。誰よりも理解している。私についてこい。
The Boys: [exit the car uninjured] Aaahhh! [they move along the street, but notice the homeless everywhere. Another collision takes place a block away from them]
Kyle: Holy shit, dude! [behind him, the other three boys move a manhole cover off to one side, opening up a new means of escape]
まじかよ!
Stan: Over here! [Kyle looks back. Cartman and Kenny drop down into the sewer and Kyle walks to the manhole.] Jump down! Go! [Kyle drops down, and finally, Stan]
こっちだ。飛び込め!
Cartman: [pinching his nose shut with his left hand as he fans the smell away with his right] Aw man, it really smells like Kenny’s house down here.
ここマジ、ケニーんちの臭いだ。
Kenny: [punches Cartman angrily] (Dude, shut the fuck up about my house!)
Cartman: Whoa, Kenny, relax dude. We need to work together.
ケニー落ち着けって、団結しなきゃ。
Stan: Come on, we gotta get to that scientist’s house. [they move forward.]
ほら、学者の家いくぞ
[South Park, street level, day. The homeless have paralyzed the town as crashed cars are shown everywhere. The community center roof is shown, with Randy looking out over the parking lot with binoculars. Gerald and Jimbo sit in chairs]
Randy: [lowers his binoculars] No sign of anybody else.
他の誰の気配もない
Gerald: [rising from his chair] That’s it. I’m gonna make a break for it.
私が脱出してみる
Randy: [turns around to face him] Don’t be crazy, Gerald. You’ll never get through all those homeless people.
正気になれ。通り抜けるのは無理だ!
Stephen: And even if you did, what then? You can’t drive anywhere.
通りぬけたとしても運転も無理だろ。
Gerald: If I can make it through them, maybe I can catch the bus to Fairplay. I have to try.
通りぬけて、フェアプレイ行きのバスをここによこしてみる!
Randy: You won’t make it through, Gerald! [Gerald leaves quickly and heads downstairs. He leaves the community center, only to be hounded by bums begging for change]
できっこない!
Gerald: [making his way through] Ahh. Ahhhahhahahahh.
Bums: Change? Change sir? You got some change?
お恵みを
Gerald: Don’t have any change… Don’t have any change… Damn it! All right, you want change? Here.[reaches into his left pocket and tosses some change off to his left] There! There’s some change. All right, a little bit. [reaches into his right pocket and tosses some change off to his right] There you go. Take the change. [leaves, but stops himself] Oh wait. Wait, now I don’t have any change left for the bus. Hold on. Can I just get back some of that change, please?
小銭ないよ。小銭はない!クソ!欲しいか!ほら!ほら、小銭だ!ほらよ!受け取れ!待て!バスに乗る小銭がない。ちょっと小銭返してくれない?
Bum 12: Change, sir?
お恵みを
Gerald: Can I have just a little change for the bus, please? I need a little… anybody have some change? Change? Got any change? [Randy follows Gerald through his binoculars] Change. Change? [Randy lowers his binoculars in horror]
少し小銭分けてくれ。少しでいいから小銭恵んで。恵んで。小銭恵んで。お恵みを
Stephen: What happened?
どうなった?
Randy: [closes his eyes] He’s become one of them.
仲間入りした。
[South Park, night, under a full moon. All around town, the homeless ask for change. The boys are shown arriving at an office of some sort. They knock on the door and the homeless researcher answers it]
Homeless Advisor: Go away, I I don’t have any change.
どっかいけ!小銭はない!
Stan: Are you the head of Homeless Studies?
ホームレス研究家の人?
Homeless Advisor: Yes. Who are you?
あぁ、誰だね?
Stan: We think this may be our friend’s fault. [shows Kyle] He gave one of the homeless twenty dollars yesterday-
これ友達のせいかも。昨日20ドルあげちゃったの。
Homeless Advisor: Oh my God. Get in here! Tell me what’s going on? [the boys enter and he shuts the door]
なんてことを。入れ。なぜここに?
Stan: There’s a bunch of people trapped in the middle of town surrounded by homeless people. W-we can’t get to them.
町の真ん中で取り残されてる人がいて。助けたいんだ。
Cartman: All right, all right, look! I didn’t wanna risk it, but… I think I know what to do. I’ll try to jump all those homeless and get to the people on that roof.
わかったよ!危険は冒したくなかったが、おいらがホームレス飛び越えて奴らを救う。
Homeless Advisor: Jump them?
飛び越える?
Cartman: I jump the homeless professionally. If you can get me a skateboard, I’ll try to jump that homeless crowd and save those people.
おいらホームレス・ジャンプの専門家だ。スケボーで飛び越えて救う。
Kyle: Oh, shut up, Cartman. All you did was jump over one homeless guy.
黙ってろよ。飛んだのは1人だろが。
Cartman: I easily could have cleared another thirty or forty.
3,40人は軽くいける。
Kyle: You barely made it over one, fatass!
1人でギリだったろ!デカ尻!
Stan: Kyle, enough! Cartman jumping more homeless people isn’t gonna solve anything right now!
カイル。もういい!飛んで欲しい人数はいいから!
Kyle: God damn it! I don’t want him to jump over more a-
ざっけんな!ジャンプなんか頼んで
Homeless Advisor: Boys! Boys! I don’t think you quite understand how the homeless function. Perhaps you should come downstairs. To my laboratory. [lightning and thunderclaps follow]
君たち!ホームレスの生態をわかってないだろ。来るべきだな、地下の研究室に。
[South Park Community Center, night. The homeless now call up to the roof.]
Randy: We don’t have any change! Go away!
小銭は持ってねぇ!失せろ!
Linda: Anything, Stephen?
どう?スティーブン?
Stephen: No. All the phone lines are completely down. [the stairwell door behind them rattles and they turn to face it in fear. Randy steps toward it with his shotgun and cocks it. More knocking on the door]
電話回線が完全にだめだ。
A Man: [inside the stairwell] Hello? Ih-it’s Steve Garrett from the library. Pu-please let us in.
おーい、スティーブ。ギャレットだ、入れてくれ。
Randy: Find another place to hide, Steve!
よそへ行くんだな!
Steve: I I have others with me. We we have nowhere else to go. One woman here is pregnant.
他の者もいるし、行く当てもない。妊婦もいるんだ。
Stephen: We can’t just leave them out there.
ほっとけないぞ
Steve: Let us in! For God’s sake, they’re coming! No! No, I’m sorry, we don’t have any change.
入れてくれ!頼む!あぁ、来た!よせ!小銭はない!
Linda: You have to let them in, Randy.
入れてあげなきゃ。
Randy: There isn’t enough food for more people up here!
余分な食料がないんだ!
Steve: Oh God. One of them is a war veteran. [more knocking] We’re gonna have to give him some change.
やばい!退役軍人がいる!小銭あげなきゃならん。
Stephen: This isn’t happening!
こんなことって!
Randy: All right all right, fine! [approaches slowly and opens the door. The refugees stream forth]
わかった!わかったよ!
Bum 13: Could you spare some change, sir?
恵んでくれませんか?
Randy: [shuts the door quickly] Harrrh!
[The Homeless Advisor’s lab, later. He’s dissected the body of a dead homeless person.]
Homeless Advisor: I’ve dissected several homeless to see what make them tick. Their anatomy is shockingly similar to ours. See? Everything is there: heart, lungs, kidneys, they’re almost identical to us in every way. Except for one. [a homeless man is chained to a wall by a chain around his neck. The advisor approaches him] The homeless… can survive solely… on change. [pulls out some change]
何が彼らを動かすのか解剖してみたんだ。驚くことに私達と同じだった。ほら、心臓や肺、腎臓、ほとんどの点で同じだ。1つを除いてな。ホームレスは小銭で生きていけるのだ。
Bum 14: [sticks out his cup and strains to get the money] Change?
お恵みを
Homeless Advisor: They feed on our change. They need it in order to keep them moving
小銭を糧にしてるんで動き続けるために
Bum 14: Is that… is that some spare change?
小銭恵んで
Homeless Advisor: Somehow they’re able to take… our change… and turn it into nourishment, sustenance.
何らかの形で小銭を食べ物や栄養物に変化させる。
Bum 14: Spare some of that change, sir?
恵んでよ。
Homeless Advisor: But now watch. [drops some coins into the bum’s cup and walks back to the boys. The bum rattles his cup a bit]
見てろ
Bum 14: Spare some change?
小銭恵んで
Homeless Advisor: It has already completely forgotten that I’ve given it change. It just wants… more, change. Look over here. [heads to his left and the boys follow] This one I’ve kept deprived of change for over three days.
既に恵んだことを完全に忘れてる。ただひたすら恵んでと。こっちに。これには3日以上小銭を与えていない。
Bum 15: Chaaaaange?
お恵みを
Kyle: What’s it doing?
何してんの?
Homeless Advisor: It’s dying.
死にかけてる。
Cartman: Cool.
クール。
Homeless Advisor: I’ve learned that the nearby city of Evergreen had a homeless problem just before we did. And they were able to stop it.
エバーグリーンでホームレス問題が起きた時、彼らは食い止めたんだ。
Gerald: [finds the advisor’s office and enters] Excuse me, the front door was open. Can I borrow some change? [other homeless men follow him in]
すみません、ドア開いてますよ。小銭貸してくれません?
Homeless Advisor: Oh my God, they’re coming in! [leads the boys to an escape hatch above some crates] Quick kids, get out of here! You can fit!
まずい!入ってきた!ここから逃げろ!君らなら通れる!
Kyle: [helps Cartman up] What about you?
あんたは?
Homeless Advisor: Get to Evergreen and find out how they got rid of the homeless! I’ll be all right!
エバーグリーンでどうやって片付けたか探れ!私はいいから。
Cartman: Eh! Stop pushing, Kenny.
押すなよ。ケニー。
Gerald: Hello? [comes down a spiral staircase] I I’m sorry, I just really need some change for the bus?
あのー、バスに乗る小銭がいるんです。
Bum 16: Change?
お恵みを。
Bum 17: Spare some change?
お恵みを。
Bum 18: Change?
お恵みを。
Gerald: Stop it! I really do need change!
やめろ!私は本当にいるんだ。
Bum 16: Me too. Change?
わしもさ。恵んで。
Gerald: [outside the lab] Change? [knocks on the lab door] Hello? Do you have any change?
あの、小銭持ってません?
Bum: [outside the lab] Chaaange?
お恵みを。
Homeless Advisor: Sorry to take the easy way out. [takes a gun to his right temple and cocks it. An exterior view of his office is shown and a gunshot heard. Back inside, he’s still standing, in pain. The bullet went out the left temple, but didn’t kill him.] OW! OH, FUCK! OWW! [next he tries shooting through his jaw, and the bullet comes out through his right cheek.] OHHH! AH! GOD! [shoots through his jaw again, and the bullet goes out his right cheek again. This time he gargles and drops on all fours. He shoots through his right shoulder three times, but still lives. This time he takes the gun to his forehead and cocks the gun. The exterior view of his office is shown again and a gunshot is heard. Back inside, he’s still alive. The bullet to the brain didn’t kill him. This time he shoots at his heart twice, and that finally kills him. He writhes around for a few seconds and dies.]
こんな方法ですまん。
[The South Park Community Center. There are so many homeless people now that it looks like a page out of “Where’s Waldo?” There are now thirteen people on the roof, all asking for change.]
Randy: [rifling through a box] No. No, damn it! [faces the small group on the roof with him] That’s it. That’s it, everyone. We’re out of Pop-Tarts.
あぁ、もう、クソ!もう終わりだ、みんな。コーンフレークがキレた。
Jimbo: No. We can’t be.
そんな、まさか。
Randy: Face it, we’re gonna starve!
餓死するんだ!
Linda: No, no wait, there’s still a box over here.
まだこれがあるわ。
Randy: Those are cherry! Ich!
イチゴ味だぜ!
Head of Public Safety: [his cell phone rings and he rises] Wait, I got a signal! I got a signal. [dials a number]
待て!電波が入った!
Gerald: What? You do?
え?
Randy: How? Call the fire department.
救助を。
Head of Public Safety: I’m calling my wife! [waits for her to pick up] Mary. Mary baby, are you all right?
妻に電話だ!メアリー大丈夫か?
Linda: Oh, maybe we’re gonna be okay.
これで安心ね。
Stephen: Ask her what’s happening.
どうなってるか聞け。
Head of Public Safety: Mary, what’s goin’ on out there? Nobody’s coming for us. They what? No! That’s impossible. But how can that be? We didn’t even- [the phone cuts out] Hello? Mary. [tries to reconnect]Mary!
外はどうなってる?誰も助けに来ないんだ。何?そんな!ありえん!なんでそんな。もしもし?メアリー?メアリー!
Jimbo: What happened, Glen?
どうした?
Glen: [Head of Public Safety] There’s no help coming! She said… because of all the homeless… because of all the homeless in South Park property values have plummeted. I had two liens against my house and so the bank is foreclosing! I don’t have a home anymore. [Randy and the others are quiet for a moment, but Randy knows what he must do. He pumps his shotgun and aims at Glen.]
助けは来ない。妻が言うには、ホームレスだらけのサウスパークの不動産価値が急落して、先取特権で俺の家が銀行に流れた。家がなくなっちまった。
Linda: Randy, what are you doing?
何してるの!
Randy: He’s homeless now. We aren’t safe.
今じゃホームレス!危険だ!
Glen: I’m not like them.
奴らと違う!
Randy: Not yet. It’s only a matter of time.
まだな、時間の問題だ。
Linda: [tries dissuading Randy] And what are you gonna do, huh? Just blow his head off?
どうするのよ!頭を吹き飛ばす気?
Randy: If we have to! Siddown Glen!
必要ならな!座れグレン。
Glen: Randy, you can’t just-
ランディ、そんな。
Randy: SIT… doowwwnnnn!
座れってぇぇ
[Another shot of the homeless on the street.]
[Back to a shot of the roof. Glen is sitting under a blanket again.]
Glen: This is crazy. How can they just take away my house? Where am I supposed to put all my things? I don’t have a place for all my stuff; where am I supposed to put all my stuff? I’ll need to pay for storage. Can I borrow some- money to put my stuff in storage? Come on guys. If you all just help me out a little bit. Each one of you just put in a little… change? Change?[That’s it. Randy fires at him and blows the upper half of his head off. Randy sighs heavily]
なんでだ。家を奪うなんて。家の物はどうすりゃいい。置き場所ないし、どこに置けばいい。倉庫借りよう、少し倉庫代貸してくれる?なぁみんな。ほんのすこしでいいからさ、小銭でもいいから、恵んで。恵んで。
[A brilliant sunrise in the Rockies. Another shot reveals a ruined town – Evergreen. The four boys arrive and look at the destruction]
Stan: What the hell happened here? [three men in camouflage appear and aim their shotguns at them]
何があったんだ?
Man 1: [wearing a white and blue bandana around his neck] That’s far enough! Just march your butts right back out of our town!
そこまでだ!引き返しやがれ!
Stan: We, just came to ask a question.
質問しに来たんだ。
Man 2: You homeless or homeowners?
ホームレスか?家持ってるか?
Kyle: We’re nine.
9歳だよ。
Man 1: Yeah? Well that makes you homeless, so get out of here before you die!
ならホームレスだな。死ぬ前に出てけ!
Stan: Look, we just need help with our own homeless problem.
ちょっと助けがいるんだ。
Cartman: Yeah. This Jew here made them take over our town.
あぁ、このユダヤ人のせいでな。
Kyle: Shut up, Cartman!
黙れ!カートマン!
Man 1: Cartman? Eric Cartman? The kid who jumped thirty homeless people on a skateboard?
カートマン?エリック・カートマン?スケボーで30人のホームレスを飛び越えた?
Cartman: Youu heard about that?
どこ情報だ?
Man 2: Heard about it? They said you could have easily cleared fifty homeless with that jump.
50人は飛び越えられたと聞いたぞ。
Cartman: Thirty was hard enough.
30人は苦労したな。
Kyle: Oh God! It wasn’t thirty, it was one! He jumped over one homeless person with his stupid skateboard, and he barely made it over that guy!
おい!30人だと?1人だろが!こいつが飛び越えたのは1人でしかもギリギリだった!
Stan: Kyle, knock it off! We’re here to find out how to get rid of the homeless, not how many homeless Cartman can jump!
カイル、やめろ!ホームレス退治の方法を聞きに来たんだ、飛んだ人数じゃない!
Cartman: Please, we just want you to tell us how you got rid of the homeless in your town.
どうやってホームレス片付けたんだ?
Man 2: Well, that was easy. [the group moves to a clearing where the boys sit on a bench while the first man serves himself some coffee and begins explaining]
まぁ簡単だったぜ。
Man 1: The homeless first started arriving in Evergreen about three months ago. At first there were only a few of them, askin’ for change, sleeping in the parks. But then more showed up, and we realized there was somethin’ different about them. They fed off of our change to the point that they could actually start renting apartments. We knew it wouldn’t be long before the homeless actually started buying homes. And then we’d have no idea who was homeless and who wasn’t! The people living in the house right next door to you could be homeless and you wouldn’t even know! [sips] Nobody could trust anybody! Fights broke out. War! [Kyle notices something on the ground] That’s when I started suspecting that [the something is a pamphlet that says “HAVEN FOR THE HOMELESS” on the front cover. He picks it up] my own wife, who I’d been living with for twenty years, was actually homeless. So I had to burn her. In her bed while she slept. [Kyle reads the pamphlet] After she died I vowed I wouldn’t let the homeless destroy our town! So we came up with a plan to get rid of them once and for all.[Kyle opens the pamphlet and is met with these words: “HAVEN FOR THE HOMELESS. TRY SOUTH PARK.”]
ホームレスは3ヶ月前くらいに来はじめた。最初は少数で公園に寝泊まりしていた。だがさらに現れた。そいつらは何か違ってた。恵んでもらった金でアパートを借り始めたのだ。そして家を買い始めるのに時間はかからなかった。そして誰がホームレスだかわからなくなった!隣に住んでる奴がホームレスでもわからないんだ!誰も信じられなくなり争いが発生し、戦争だ。そして俺の妻に思い始めた。20年共に住んできたが、ホームレスかもと!だから焼き殺した。寝てる間にな。そして誓った。ホームレスにこの町を壊させないと。そして追い出す計画を考えだした。
Kyle: You son of a bitch. [gets off the bench and approaches the first man with the pamphlet] You didn’t solve your homeless problem, you just sent all your homeless to South Park! [opens the pamphlet to show him]
このやろう、何も解決してない。サウスパークに追いやっただけだろ!
Man 1: That’s right, yes.
その通り。
Stan: What?
え?
Kyle: I knew it! It wasn’t because I gave that guy twenty dollars! The homeless all came from here!
やっぱりだ!20ドルあげたからじゃない!ここから来たんだ!
Man 1: And it was Texas who sent them to us! People in San Antonio got rid of their homeless by tellin’ them what a great place Evergreen was!
ここにはテキサスからだ。サンアントニオの奴らがここはいいとこだって追いやったんだ。
Stan: [getting off the bench] But then you didn’t solve the problem, you just moved it!
ただ移動させただけかよ!
Man 1: Right. But we survived.
そうだ。だが生き延びた。
Woman: [pops up out of nowhere, almost a skeleton] Dehhhnyihhhs! [she’s armed with a rifle and ready to shoot]
ダァニャァァスゥ!
Dennis: [Man 1, turns around. The other two men look as well] Christine!
クリスティーン!
Christine: You sonothatitch! You tried to kinn me!
このやろう!ころそうとしやがって。
Dennis: I had to, Christine, you were homeless.
お前ホームレスだったろ!
Christine: No, I wasn’t honeless yeh stukid asshole!
ホームレスじゃないわよ。くそったれ。
Dennis: Christine, I can’t understand you.
クリスティン。何言ってる?
Christine: Yeah! Gecause you durned my yits oth!
私を焼きやがって!
Dennis: I nurned your rip sauce?
たわしを炊きやがって?
Christine: No! You durned my yits oth!
違う!私を焼きやがって!
Dennis: I have no idea what you’re saying! [Christine shoots him] Ow! [Dennis is dead. The third man kills Christine, who fires one final shot and hits the second man. The second man kills the third and dies moments later]
全然わからん。
Stan: Dude, our parents are just as stupid as these people, our town is gonna end up just like this!
俺達の親もこれくらいあほだぞ。町がこうなっちゃう。
Kyle: [turns around] No it isn’t. Come on, I have an idea.
させない!考えがある!
Stan: No no, we’re not having Cartman jump any more homeless people, Kyle!
いやいや、カートマンのジャンプはもういいってば。
Kyle: That isn’t my idea! I saw a bus in a garage a couple of blocks back! We need to modify it!
それ僕の考えじゃない!向こうのガレージにあったバスを改造するんだ。
Kenny: (What are you gonna do?)
Kyle: We’re gonna save our parents before they all kill each other!
ころし合う前に僕達が助け出す。
[Montage: the boys modify a bus. Stan works on the front fenders. Cartman works on brakes and accelerator. Kenny works on tightening the barbed wire running along the roof’s edge. Kyle works on putting up a shield in front of the bus with a screw gun. Stan moves to the transmission. Cartman and Kenny reinforce the sides of the bus. Kyle works on the PA system.]
[The community center roof. The refugees sit around. A bus horn is heard and the refugees rouse themselves. Randy looks out over the parking lot and sees the bus. The homeless clear a path for the bus]
Randy: A bus! A bus is coming!
バスだ!バスが来たぞ!
Jimbo: [seeing who’s inside] It’s the boys! They’ve modified a bus to get us out of here!
子どもたちだ!助けるためにバスを改造したんだ!
Stephen: I knew they’d come back for us!
やっぱり来てくれた!
Linda: All right!
やったわぁ!
A Woman: Yeah.
Randy: [props up Glen’s corpse so it faces the bus] Look, Glen. We’re saved. [the bus stops]
見ろグレン。助かったぞ。
Stan: All right, I’m turning around
よし!向き変える。
Stephen: Why are they turning?
なぜ向きを?
Randy: [drops the corpse] What are they doing? [the bus turns so the front end now faces away from the community center. Randy calls out] Don’t leave us!
何してる!置いてくなぁ!
Kyle: All right, hit it.
よし、やれ。
Cartman: Let’s hope to Christ this works. [prepares to press the red button. Music begins to play]
効きますように。
Backup Singers: California Love
[the homeless grow quiet]
カリフォルニア・ラブ
The Boys: California
カリフォルニア
Cartman:

Is nice to the homeless
はホームレスに親切
Californiania
カリフォニョンニョン
Supercool to the homeless
ホームレスにスーパークール

The Boys: In the city
Cartman:

City of Santa Monica
サンタモニカの町では
Lots of rich people
たくさんの金持ちが
giving change to the homeless
ホームレスに小銭を恵む

Bum: [holds up his tin can] Chaaange? [the adults on the roof still have no idea what’s going on]
恵んで
The Boys: In the city
Kyle:

City of Brentwood
ブレントウッドの町では
They take really good care
大事に世話してくれる
of all their homeless
全てのホームレスを

Cartman: [to Stan] They’re listening. Let’s go! [a Destination Marquee is shown. Stan flips switch C on and presses a green button. The marquee changes from Denver to California]
聞いてる!行くぞ!
The Boys: In the city
Cartman:

Marina del Rey
マリナデルレイの町では
They’re so nice to the homeless
ホームレスにとても優しい
built them port-a-potties
専用港も建てた

Stephen: They’re… they’re leading them away!
連れだしてる!
Jimbo: We’re gonna be all right!
これでもう大丈夫!
Randy: [props the corpse up once again] Oh Glen! We made it!
グレン!やったぞ!
Cartman: California
カリフォニャ
Supercool to the homeless
ホームレスにスーパークール
[A highway, day. The boys take the homeless westward.]
Gerald: Cha-a-ange?
お恵みを
Cartman: Californiania
カリフォニョンニョン
Idn’t on the tona
いんにゃのにゃにゃの
[Santa Monica Pier. The bus passes it going south – towards Venice Beach. The homeless follow]
The Boys: In the city
[Venice Beach. The homeless head right in and make themselves at home]
Cartman:

City of Venice
ベニスの町では
Right by Matt’s house
マット(作者)の家がそばにあり
You can chill if you’re homeless.
ホームレスならのんびりできる
[the music stops. Three homeless men sleep on the Strand and Cartman sails over them, landing on the third man and skating away]

Bum: Eughuhuh.
Cartman: [jumps off his skateboard, throws down his helmet and exults] Yes! That’s three homeless! Suck on that! Fuck yeah! [faces his friends and the bums]
よっしゃあ!ホームレス3人!やったぜ!イェー!
Stan: Honestly, I don’t know what you see in this, Kyle.
カイル、これ意味分かんないんだけど。
[End of Night of the Living Homeless.]

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